"Sisterhood, oh sisterhood, it means so much to us. It lasts a long, long, time. It lasts forever."
Forty years ago I went through Rush at Illinois Wesleyan University, pledged the Sigma Kappa House and soon after learned that chant. On Bid Day, I didn't know a single one of the 20 or so girls in my pledge class.
Two weekends ago, nine of us got together for a mini-reunion in Edwardsville. Only one regular attendee was missing - celebrating her mom's birthday. One came all the way from Florida.
While we don't like to admit that we met 40 years ago, we do appreciate the fact that preserving our friendships over four decades is an accomplishment.
Our pledge class shrunk before we graduated, and a few moved out of state after graduation (hence the drop from 20 to 9). But the core group of us has been getting together regularly for most of our lives.
At first we saw each other at bridal showers and weddings, and then, after a few years, at baby showers. At some point, we all started traveling to Shelbyville in August. We rented cabins and those who had kids brought them along. It was truly a girls weekend, as the 10 of us produced 14 daughters and only four sons. (The boys often stayed home.)
For years, I hosted a Sigma Kappa sleepover while Dan and Ainsley were at Indian Princess campouts. We spent literally all of our time, except for when we were sleeping, around my dining room table, eating, laughing, playing games and telling stories. The summer before COVID we were lucky enough to spend a few days at a beachfront condo in Siesta Key, which was a blast.
And now we've started attending our kids' weddings. I have to admit it's rather strange to pose for a photo at a friend's daughter's wedding with the same people who were at my own wedding.
No matter where we are, every time we get together we marvel at how easy it is to fall back into our friendship - even if some of us haven't talked or seen each other since the last gathering.
When we went to dinner on Saturday night this year, we began the evening by sharing something we appreciate about the person sitting to our right. Some of the stories were familiar and others were new, but all were heartfelt. Many of us, including myself, were brought to tears by the words others shared.
Our conversations have changed, of course, since the days we lived at the sorority house or even since the first few years after we graduated. Divorce, infertility, job pressures, losing loved ones, our children's struggles - these are the issues we discuss now.
But there's still so much joy, in new relationships, in our kids' accomplishments and, for two in the group, in being grandparents. (Can I possibly be old enough to have sorority sisters who are grandparents?)
One of the stories we always enjoy reliving is the decision older girls in the house made to delay our initiation. We weren't close enough, they said. They united us in our frustration, if nothing else. We still laugh about that and wonder what they would say if they saw us now.
We do have a lot of strong personalities in our group. At one point Saturday night everyone was talking loudly at the same time, offering different suggestions.
"I'm pretty sure this right here is why they delayed our initiation," I said, and we all laughed.
But that doesn't stop us from loving each other.
Sisterhood, now we know, will last forever.
- Pamela Lannom is editor of The Hinsdalean. Readers can email her at [email protected].
